Okay, now that we’ve gotten the etiquette post out of the way, let’s talk about tonight’s show and what to…
TONIGHT TONIGHT TONIGHT – part 1
Tonight! It’s the Eurovision final! And yes, Eurovision watcher, it’s going to be a fun night! But not really! Because…
Semifinal 2: SHOW GUIDE
Good morning people who likely got waaaay more sleep than I did. I’m blearily writing this on a train from…
Semifinal 1: SHOW GUIDE for LOCALS
Hey all! I’ve just come back from the Semifinal 1 Jury Show and woweeewowowowow. It’s a DOOZY. So I’ve created…
Italy – Brividi by Mahmood and Blanco
THIS. THIS is how you do it, sadbois. You don’t write meta emotional songs about having emotions. You don’t write…
France – Fulenn by Alvan and Ahez
2022 will be the first year ever that there is not a song in French in the Eurovision Song Contest…
Spain – SloMo by Chanel
THIS IS THE TOTAL PACKAGE. Vocals? Check Song? Check Staging? Check Hypnotizing booty? CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK Seriously, I…
United Kingdom – Spaceman by Sam Ryder
First of all, can we all acknowledge that Konstrakta needs to change her lyrics to: “What is the secret of…
Germany – Rockstars by Malik Harris
Okay, before we talk about Rockstars, I want to show you this video from the Eurovision House Party, where Malik…
Serbia – In Corpore Sano – Konstrakta
Okay, let’s get this out of the way right away: This is not a song about Meghan Markle. I know…