Armenia – Snap by Rosa Linn

Okay, before I get to reviewing Snap by Rosa Linn, I’d like us all to take a moment to pour … More

Norway – Give that Wolf a Banana by Subwoolfer

“I love bangers!” I said. “Give me more bangers!” I said. “There aren’t enough bangers in this year’s Eurovision!” I … More

OH MY GOD THE ANGST I am not the target audience for this song. I am an old, and while … More

Did you hear Portugal’s song and think, “Wow, I really like this vibe, but could use a little more yeehaw?” … More

We’ve had two and a half lilting female ballads lulling us into a sense of security, which means it’s time … More

Denmark, you ALMOST had it right. We all know that Eurovision songs have a strict time limit. Three minutes and … More

Okay, okay – let’s get the obvious out of the way first: Mia Dimšić’s Guilty Pleasure is very much not … More

Have you caught your breath from that burst of Moldovan energy? If not, Portugal is here to give you a … More

MOLDOVA, YOU BEAUTIFUL GENIUSES! YOU’VE DONE IT AGAIN! You know why I love Moldova at Eurovision? Because they only care … More

Here’s my disclaimer: As a certified banger slut, I generally hate any song that’s under 120 BPM. I believe Eurovision … More