Cyprus: Andrew Lambrou and Break a Broken Heart

Remember in 2018, when Fuego and Eleni Foureria’s hairography earned her a permanent spot on the ESC250? And 2019, when … More

Latvia: Sudden Lights and Aija

The great thing about Eurovision 2023 is that there is literally something for everyone. Metal? YUP! Sadbois? YUP! Big-voiced divas? … More

*Sigh* I really wish we could scrub the term “female empowerment” from Eurovision. Sure, it sometimes has relevance, like that … More

Okay, so you know how I just spent a bunch of words gushing over Ireland’s kiss-off anthem? Well, North Macedonia … More

I need to let go of a minor rant before I start reviewing this song formally. For those among us … More

Do you like Britpop? Did you spend the 1990s wishing you were Bez? Do you think Eurovision would be improved … More

Who has the misfortune to perform between Portugal’s Spoon Man (and his slut-dropping sidekick) and everyone’s favourite Zaddy? That’s right. … More

Oh my god there are so many songs in Semifinal 1 and I guess it’s time to do the official … More

In continuing my trawl through Semifinal 1 for official reviews, I’ve landed on Montenegro, with the song Heaven by the … More

Have you ever gone to a party and everyone’s laughed at a joke and you don’t quite get it but … More