The Netherlands – De Diepte by S10

Here’s my disclaimer: As a certified banger slut, I generally hate any song that’s under 120 BPM. I believe Eurovision … More

Bulgaria – Intention by Intelligent Music Project

So in my last review, I commended a band for having a song that appealed to people of all ages. … More

Ukraine – Stefania by Kalush Orchestra

Look, we all know that the people of Ukraine are going through unimaginable atrocities right now. And a dumb Eurovision … More

Slovenia – Disko by LPS

LPS (which stands for “Last Pizza Slice”) are probably not going to win Eurovision 2022. But do you know what … More

Switzerland – Marius Bear – Boys Do Cry

Trigger Warning: Intense Yelling at Sadbois, who are sad enough and probably don’t need a mean woman compounding things NO. … More

Lithuania – Sentimentai by Monika Liu

Watch out, viewers – Monika Liu has released the hottest Eurovision song of 1977. I know that seems mean. I … More

Latvia – Eat Your Salad – Citi Zeni

I cannot be objective about Eat Your Salad. They have been at the top of my personal scoreboard for months. … More

Albania: Sekret by Ronela Hajati

Semifinal 1 is going to open with a BANG, y’all! Ronela Hajati can sing. Ronela Hajati can rap. Ronela Hajati … More

Take a deep breath and touch grass

People. Stop. Just stop. This is not the “worst Eurovision ever.” Look, you don’t have to like every song. You … More

Why Pabandom Is Naujo is not good, and why Pabandom Is Naujo is great.

Remember in 2020, when Eurovizijos Atranka rebranded as Pabandom Is Naujo, and we had a magical six weeks of entrancing … More